Embracing the Season of No Embrace (God works all things for Good)

Ecclesiastes 3:5 1599 Geneva Bible (GNV)

5 A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones: a time to embrace, and a time to be far from embracing.

 

Over the years I have discovered that divorce has helped me. God works all things together for Good for those who love Him who are the called according to His purpose. (See Romans 8:28) He even turns a negative loss like abandonment and divorce into something beautiful.

Now as I see people getting married, I am happy for them. I am truly glad to see couples in love and getting married and serving God.

And I am happy for me too.

Because I'm single.

Getting married is right for them, in their season. And singleness is right for me, in this season.

Understanding seasons has helped me to maintain a proper attitude toward the romance and marriages of others. It is tempting to want to feel sorry for myself. But I choose.... CHOOSE.... not to do that. It is rather self-centred to make someone else's marriage about "ME".

So my choice is to feel glad instead. Because I know what kind of work goes into marriage, and I know what happens when one marries a false person.

My divorce motivates me to love the Lord fiercely.

My divorce motivates me to fearlessly explore and experience completion (nothing lacking) in Christ, as a single.

It motivates me to minister to other divorced Christians with grace and compassion. 

 
Do I think I will marry again someday? Oh, more than likely I will, years down the road. Marriage is a beautiful God-ordained institution between one man and one woman.
 When the seasons change, I will remarry.

And that's the key... we must strive to understand God's seasons. They don't operate the same way as the natural seasons do. When a season changes in the natural, everyone experiences it. But when seasons change in your life, they are individual changes, not necessarily changes for everyone in your community. That is the beauty of being a disciple of Jesus Christ. God has individual destinies for each of us, within His larger destiny for all His children.

 I don't feel bad about others getting married now, because marriage is a season... it's the season that some people are in. It's the right season for them to be in.

 

And... Singleness is another season, one that many others are in. It's the right season for me to be in now.
 Once we understand that God works in seasons and that not everyone has to do or be the same thing, at the same time, then we can feel more contentment and peace with where God has led us so far.

Over these past 7 years, I have embraced the season of no embrace.

 

That is a miracle.
 

For someone like me who almost idolized marriage when I was a young man, this is a true breakthrough. Don't get me wrong, Biblical marriage is good. But I took it to extremes when I was young. I thought God's whole plan for me revolved around marriage (and this is before I was actually married).

 God did not cause my divorce, but since it did happen, He has turned it for a good purpose. He has used it to challenge me to read what the Bible says about singleness. He showed me that singleness is a seasonal gift. And now, He has succeeded in changing and balancing my perspective on the two gifts (singleness and marriage). He proved to me that singleness is a good season and a gift, just like the season and gift of marriage. God, and His Word, changed my thinking. Praise God.
 

And now, as I have embraced this season, I find that God has filled my arms and my heart with His very own pure love. He has met me here in this season. His love is real. To embrace the season of no embrace is to trust Jesus Christ's unique plan for my life, and to believe what He is doing is right for me, and for His purposes. I choose to embrace His plan and to embrace the pure Love of God.
 

-Pastor Curtis

Mon Oct 24 2016, 11:03PM EST