Ever been struck by a thought??? I have before! But this time, I have been struck with not just a thought, but with a revelation out of the Word of God. His word hit my mind and heart and opened my understanding about what God desires to do to promote women who may feel sidelined by society or religion or tradition.
Psalm 113:9 NKJV
He grants the barren woman a home, LIKE a joyful mother of children. Praise the Lord!
Psalm 113:9 AMP Classic
9 He makes the barren woman to be a homemaker and a joyful mother of [spiritual] children. Praise the Lord! (Hallelujah!)
I have recently been confronted with the heavily implied idea that a single Christian man is better to marry a woman who can bear natural children to him. This may be true in some cases, but this did not feel like a complete Bible picture to me. I couldn't put my finger on why.... at least not at that time.
What is it that makes a marriage work? Is it the ability to have children? I think not. There must first be a oneness and a unity of mind and in the Spirit of Christ in order to make a marriage last a lifetime. This oneness in agape Love is what makes a marriage work. Through that oneness, children are often conceived. But not always. Even without children, a unified marriage can last for decades... see Abraham and Sarah, who had a successful marriage for MANY YEARS long before they ever brought forth a child (by miracle of God).
So, to be clear I completely agree with and support the Bible concepts that God is for marriage and He is for family. Be fruitful and multiply. (Not to mention that Jesus fulfilled Gen 1:28 without having natural children by raising disciples - Mat 5:17).
BUT
Not all people are able to have children. God cares about them. Should they be denied married life? How can they fulfill the desire of God to raise up new generations? I believe the Word of God supplies us with all these answers.
I used to be married to an infertile "barren" woman years ago. I prayed to the Lord and was at peace with giving up my natural heritage to gain a spiritual heritage in the family of God.
I was faithful to her. My church family, Church On The GO was gracious to welcome her as my new wife and included her as spiritual family. I am grateful for my pastor and my church to this day because of their godly, agape attitude toward those that society would overlook.
Sadly, she took the kindness, inclusion, and love for granted, and abandoned me, and our church. After refusing to come home, I became divorced after that (1 Cor. 7:15). Now, my marriage is over (Hosea 2:2) and I have forgiven my ex-wife and moved on from her. I have been divorced for over 11 years now, and God has healed me and maintained me and grown my ministry thanks to His grace, and thanks to my church.
But my heart to minister to certain kinds of people never stopped. Due to my own loss, my desire to minister to them with God's care has only grown.
See, I really have a heart toward the singles, and the childless.
Toward Christians who wanted marriage and have not gained it (as of yet).
Toward divorced Christians who were faithful, yet were betrayed and abandoned by their former spouse.
Toward Christians who wanted to have children yet never could.
My heart breaks for these dear saints of God.
God loves them just as much as He loves those who marry successfully and have lots of children.
God does not forget those that society forgets. And I have a heart to understand the dear saints who feel dedicated to do the work of the ministry exclusively, focusing on raising only spiritual children. I had previously discovered some precious truths in Isaiah 56. That chapter shows God's heart toward the eunuch, the one who could not reproduce naturally. If the man would dedicate himself to the Lord, then God offered him an eternal name and monument "better than sons and daughters". Read that chapter to learn more. (Isaiah 56:3-5)
And Jesus expanded the idea of eunuchs to include those who choose to stay single and also to those who do not have kids for the Kingdom of God's sake. (Read Matthew 19:12)
Blueletterbible - whole definition of eunuch here:
https://www.blueletterbible.org/lang/lexicon/lexicon.cfm?Strongs=G2135&t=KJV
Key Part of the definition is as follows:
"one naturally incapacitated
1. for marriage
2. begetting children"
The other word for eunuch in that verse is:
https://www.blueletterbible.org/lang/lexicon/lexicon.cfm?Strongs=G2134&t=KJV
Basically some people are single or childless, but not by direct choice. Jesus loves and accepts you, just the way you are. He loves you. He has a place and a home for you. This has both natural and spiritual implications.
Others are single or childless by direct choice, "for the Kingdom of Heaven's sake" (Mat. 19:12). Jesus loves and accepts you as well. Not all can accept this kind of special calling that yields up the natural heritage to focus on building the spiritual heritage of the Lord. But certain Christians CAN accept it. Jesus recognizes that and has a home and place for them as well!
Now the Biblical pattern in marriage is when a man and woman marry, and produce natural children. This is GOOD and RIGHT! It is to be commended and encouraged, especially among young Christian couples (aged 18-30).
(According to Psalm 90:10, the average human age is between 70-80, thus middle age actually begins around 35, upwards of age 40, based on Scripture). As long as it is medically and financially feasible, and the couple is hearing that call of God, they should be encouraged to produce children and grow their natural family, and raise that family to follow Jesus Christ! If you do so, prepare for some immense challenges that will force you to focus on your natural family more than your church ministry. People with a spouse and children must treat their spouse and children as their first ministry. Church ministry will have to come lower down the list.
But what about those who cannot reproduce? Does God cast them aside? Does He sideline them, the way other people do? (even some in the church do that sadly, though not all)
Or does He place them in their own home? Does He grant them marriage?
I knew the answer was yes... BUT could not see the verse.
I was certain God wanted to show me more. And THEN I discovered it, the verse above, Psalm 113:9. It struck me.
Psa 113:9 NKJV
He grants the barren woman a home, LIKE a joyful mother of children. Praise the Lord!
The Lord desires to give the barren woman a home. Her own home could mean living as a single. It could mean living in a marriage. And I also believe this refers ultimately to the churches, the family of God as well.
He desires to make her "like" a joyful mother of children. That term "like" is a comparative term, not necessarily to be taken literally. Some translations just say "make" but the NKJV says "like". So for this reason I believe God can make the barren woman a joyful mother in different ways.
This can happen three ways.
1. God intervenes with a miracle and enables her to literally conceive in marriage, or
2. the childless married couple adopts, or
3. she becomes a spiritual mother, and trains up spiritual children as disciples, just as Jesus, Paul and John do in the New Testament.
All three options are valid. Each option stands alone as valid, or can stand together as valid.
God is in the business of growing families and it is never too late to start (see Elizabeth or Sarah's stories in the Bible).
God wants to set the barren and the eunuch (naturally infertile) in their own marriages. He wants them to have homes and families. It may be that the family they have is spiritual. First the natural, then the spiritual. Both rails ("natural" and "spiritual") are needed to keep the train of understanding on the track. Natural childbirth will always be with us. If one couple does not have kids, another couple will.
BUT precious FEW are willing to raise up the spiritual family of God in Jesus' Name! We need more spiritual fathers and mothers in the church!
1 Corinthians 4:17 (NKJV)
17 For this reason I have sent Timothy to you, who is my beloved and faithful son in the Lord, who will remind you of my ways in Christ, as I teach everywhere in every church.
And more specifically, God wants all believers of every walk of life to belong to His Spiritual family in the Holy Nation (1 Peter 2:9; Ephesians 3:14-15).
God sets the childless people in their own home. That could very well mean a happy married home... a couple who is growing the spiritual family unit.
They can grow the natural family, AND/OR the spiritual family of God!
I would raise concern for any Christian couple that is NOT interested in raising any kind of family. They should, if capable and called to do so, be willing to grow the family. If they cannot raise/produce natural family, they can still work in the church (and outside of it) to raise up disciples, spiritual children for the Kingdom of Heaven, just as Jesus raised His disciples and trained them to raise their own spiritual children!
I realize this is a sensitive topic. I understand that many women WANT to be a natural mother, and they may feel utterly dissatisfied with the concept of discipleship/spiritual motherhood being a substitute. Being a natural mother is a special honour.
Being a spiritual mother is also a special honour.
I am not here to negate those feelings of disappointment or heartbreak. Rather I am here to tell you that I was once married to such a woman, and had she remained consistent and believed the Lord's Word, she would have had a successful ministry raising spiritual children.
Our childless marriage was "honourable" to God (Heb 13:4), it was valid. Because at the time, we focused on raising God's spiritual family in church.
As it stands, I am successfully raising spiritual children in the church on my own. I have done so for 20 years, by the Grace and Strength of Christ. God even showed me a recent vision, in 2020, of my spiritual legacy. He showed me all the children I have ever taught or impacted with the Gospel. He showed me a tiny glimpse... of me walking into the dawning light of Christ in eternity... and following behind me were ALL the children (many are now adults) that I have taught and raised up spiritually in the church or marketplace. My legacy is not apparent to the natural eye, but God showed me that my SPIRITUAL legacy is significant and eternal. My spiritual children are following me (from afar) into heaven! Praise the Lord! I trust God by faith on this, as always, since many of my students have grown up and gone into different parts of Canada or the world.
For those of you whose desires are overlooked, sidelined, or ignored by people... God sees you. He sees your desire for family and marriage. Regardless of your condition, age or situation, Jesus HAS a way to make it happen.
Psalm 113:9 tells us he will make the barren woman like a joyful mother of spiritual children. (according to NKJV and AMPC translations)
He can and still does natural miracles. But even if He does not do so for you, He can use you and your (future) spouse to raise up spiritual children.
Psalm 68:6 God sets the solitary in families; He brings out those who are bound into prosperity; But the rebellious dwell in a dry land.
Psa 113:9 NKJV
He grants the barren woman a home, LIKE a joyful mother of children. Praise the Lord!
Perhaps you know you are not able to have a child. But you desire marriage. What then? Should you be ignored??? Of course not! God tells us in His word He sets the solitary in families and sets the barren in homes! You SHOULD GET MARRIED if you so desire that. 1 Corinthians 7 makes it crystal clear that any man or woman with desire should get married to avoid sexual sin. There is no hidden stipulation that the barren/eunuch must remain single.
SO then, rather than focusing on what you cannot do, focus on what GOD can do in in YOU, through FAITH IN CHRIST! No matter what your condition is, God has a home and a family for you!
God bless
Pastor Curtis
Nov 22 2020 Sunday 1:05am EST
